I forget what state I was in. Ohio maybe? I’m not sure.

I was driving along, through the edges of some town when I see, for an instant, a Monarch Butterfly.

And then it hit me.
In the chest.

*whap*

Then, as they weigh so very little, the force of the wind colliding with my chest and rushing upwards pulled it along.
Right
up
into
my
HELMET

*flappityFlappityFlappity*

“AAAAAAAHHH!!!!”

There’s a flapping papery thing stuck between my jaw and my helmet. IT’S ALIVE!

*flappityflappity*

“Ahhhh! Get it out! Get it out!”

I start jamming my left index finger up by my chin to try and pull it down but it’s flapping, and the wind is pushing, and it’s flapping and it’s just going up my cheek!

“AHHHHH!!!!”

I pull my finger out and try to grab the edge of my visor to open it, and it’s flapping, and it’s moving, and the wind is beating it and there’s a truck coming and IT’S APPROACHING MY EYE!

The visor is open now but it’s not helping. It’s not coming out! I start shaking my head violently, like a Tourette’s sufferer having a bad day at forty miles an hour until eventually, finally, I manage to fling it out without flattening myself into the grill of the approaching pickup truck.

That was the only monarch I saw on the whole trip, and I’m pretty sure I killed it.